What results? My piano results. When I got my results, the feeling was like someone giving me a big tight slap on the face. Why is that so? When my piano teacher rang me up, I knew that she must have got the results. I wanted to tell her not to tell me the results as my instinct told me that it's not good. The way she talked to me made me knew my results. She began asking me what did I do on the exam day and whether I practised my pieces. I knew something was amiss at once. I wanted to stop her from telling me the results. Why? My trials is still on okay!? I can't face such a great shock. However, I wasn't capable of stopping everything from happening. My world was like being hit by earthquake when she told me I failed all three of my pieces. ALL THREE!!! I was like.. Okay.. Then, she said because of my scales my marks were pulled up. Hence, I passed my practical exam with 3 marks more than the passing mark. I was rather relieved. At least I passed. When I told my parents about the results, my dad was rather unhappy (of course la.. that pratical exam alone costs them around RM270). I felt rather useless. He began asking me to retake and some sort of things. I wasn't in the mood to actually talk to him also. My mum on the other hand was rather calm. I knew she was always on my side. It's really weird you know. I practised so hard for my pieces that my teacher always complained that I should focus on my scales (which I did not). Anyway, the fact was like that! And I can't change it. 
So, what do you expect me to do? How should I respond? This result is like.. such a failure. So what should I do? Stop playing the piano? Or never be involved in any music stuffs because it shows that I'm a total failure in music? It's just Grade 5 and I almost failed it. Gosh! I am useless in playing exam pieces. Cause I never like them. Playing and practising the same old 3 pieces throughout the year is NO FUN! Anyway, it's certified and it's certified! I almost failed my practical exam. Like it or not, I need to face that fact. Like it or not, I'm certain that I want to play the piano just for the Lord in the first place. Like it or not, whatever happens, happens for a reason. So, what is the reason? Is it God wants me to stop or what?
5 comments:
My dear girl, those grades for piano does not mean much unless u intend to be a piano teacher. You are playing the piano very well. I have grade 7....so what? I can't play like u do.... I can't even hope to play a song for church.Don't ever stop playing music for HIM.~ Wan Li
Wanted to say something encouraging but then realizing that I cannot really sing even if my life depended on it, would not give much credit to what I would say. Until I realized that the world evaluate things differently than us. You served God with your music and talent, that no one can deny. God is pleased, so should we. And we are.
Wan Li: Grades are not important.. But, it shows how far I go for my music.. Which in this case shows that I'm... =(
katan: I don't even know whether I still have the confidence to actually play the piano after this exam.. Maybe touch it but not play..
May be a bit long but hear me out...
"One of the greatest problems people have with failure is that they are too quick to judge isolated situations in their lives and label them as failures. Instead, they need to keep the bigger picture in mind."
People think Failure is avoidable - Ir's Not.
People think Failure is an event - It's Not. If you flunk a test, it doesn't mean you failed a one-time event. The F shows that you neglected the process leading up to the test.
People think Failure is objective - It's Not. Many successful people became successful thru many probelms, mistakes, or errors. They don't see setbacks as Failure.
Peopl think Failure is the enemy - It's Not. We can learn from our mistakes. The fellow who never makes a mistake takes his orders from one who does.
People think Failure is irreversible - It's Not.
People think Failure is a stigma - It's Not. Mistakes are not permanent markers.
People think Failure is final - It's Not.
Learn to FAIL FORWARD. People who fail forward are able to see errors or negative experiences as a regular part of life, learn from them, and then move on. They persevere in order to achieve their purpose in life.
"Failure is simply a price we pay to achieve success."
-the saint-
the saint: Thank you Unc William.. Will remember that.. Panjang tapi berisi.. =)
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